Male impotence is really on the increase today. Many wives talk about it among themselves. It was a prayer point recently during a marriage seminar. A doctor once commented that hardly a day would pass by without some men coming into his consultancy room to say, “Doctor, I’m afraid I’m becoming impotent.”
The truth is: though every man tends to put up a bravado attitude and projects a “sexually all-wise” image, he is regularly plagued with some sort of fears. And these fears are responsible for the many impotent cases we see in men today.
Every man must, therefore, conquer these fears if he will be s3xually fulfilled, and probably get over any form of impotence he may be suffering. To help our men, it becomes imperative to look into this situation.
Some of these fears are discussed below:
The Fear of Rejection
Many men suffer fear of rejection from their wives because of their temperament, and probably because of their past responses to their s3xual advances. Such men often approach their wives with a deep-rooted fear that they may be rejected.
Fear of extramarital affairs sex in marriage Navigating challenging moments
When a woman has a genuine reason for having to turn down her husband’s sexual advance, it is important she does it in a way that will convince him that she truly has a genuine reason to do so, and that she is neither doing it as a rejection of his person nor because she does not find him sexually attractive. This is because men are very sensitive to their wives’ opinions of them, and often, they read their wives’ NO to their sexual advances as meaning they do not find them sexually stimulating. And truly, nothing is more worrisome and discouraging to a man than this.
Every woman needs to know that a man cannot accept being considered s3xually unattractive by his wife. Nothing hurts his ego more than this. This rejection often makes husbands keep off their wives for weeks. And even when they get the courage to come, it puts them under unnecessary pressure, which may result in poor erections.
The fear of being compared to other men
Some men are also tormented by the fear of having their wives compare them to other men. This fear is often suffered by men who have married women who have known at least one other man or men before marriage. And you will agree with me that this is rather the norm than the exception. Many of these men often nurse the fear of their wives comparing them with the man/men in their past, and probably finding them less satisfying.
Every woman in this kind of situation must avoid the temptation to compare her husband with some man/men she once knew. No two men are the same. Every man is unique.
However, men in this situation should never concern themselves with their wives’ past relationships. A man, some time ago, kept asking his wife what she felt about his lovemaking ability as compared to her late husband, and he became devastated when she told him she found her late husband more sexually satisfying than he was. This confession almost broke their union. They had to end up in a counselling room before the marriage could be saved.
The fear that he will lose his erection
For a man to be able to sexually satisfy his wife, he needs a rigid penis. When the penis is limp, orgasm becomes impossible. Limp penis is the most common form of impotence in men. And every man seems to know or have heard of this happening to some well-meaning men some time ago, and secretly in his heart, he dreads this happening to him.
The fear of losing his ability to take his wife to the pinnacle of sexual intercourse that she is used to is something he cannot dare to imagine. And if by chance this happens to him at a time, it seems to him that the ultimate has happened. That which he fears has come upon him.
The next time he wants to have sex with his wife, he becomes so anxious and sincerely wishes that this time around, he will be himself, but most of the time, his experience does not differ from the previous ones, not because the event has happened as he fears, but because he is anxious.
The fear of not being able to ejaculate
Before any man experiences ejaculatory malfunction, he never thinks this can happen to him. He thinks highly of himself. But, if one day, while trying to make love to his wife, it eventually happens that he suddenly finds himself not being able to ejaculate, he becomes so devastated that the recurring fear may create a neurosis that can render a perfectly healthy man impotent.
The fear of “This is it. I think the eventuality has finally happened. I think I am going impotent” makes it happen again and again. Every time he thinks of making love to his wife, he thinks, “What if it happens again?” And when it happens again, it is like “I knew it. I am impotent.”
Fear is crippling, and it has the capacity to kill all the sexual excitement in a marriage. That is why every woman must help her husband to eliminate every form of fear to ensure a long-lasting s3xual fulfilment in their home.
Therefore, every man suffering from any type of impotence must check if he is nursing any kind of fear to ensure this is not the root cause.
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